Gender Neutrality: Femininity
That girl, hot girl walks, girl dinner, girl math, Pilates princesses. Just girly things. Modern feminism manifests itself as reclaiming just about everything as part of the girl experience. What once started as a method of expanding the restricting gender norms placed on women for so long has become a free-for-all of pointlessly gendered labels for non-gendered things. To progress forward with feminism, many white women are claiming things for themselves at the expense—and often continued oppression—of other groups. This is not feminism, it is cis white women’s empowerment, and it’s going unchecked by the claim that criticizing anything women do is anti-feminist, even when those things harm others.
Gendering
It’s 2024, there is no reason to still gender things. There is no need to make anything pink and pretty—or “aesthetic”—to make them acceptable for women. This was the method used by “girl power” feminism in the past, making women’s participation in traditionally non-feminine things acceptable. However, this only extends these privileges to sufficiently feminine people willing to conform to existing ways of being a woman. Redefining labels rather than eliminating them only empowers those who successfully conform. This is at the expense of gender-nonconforming women, trans women (especially those who don’t pass), or any other person who wants to participate in non-gendered ways.
We don’t seem to think twice about women online “reclaiming girlhood” and experiences traditionally considered feminine. At first glance, this seems harmless, or even positive, since femininity has historically been devalued. People finding joy in femininity and uplifting its status in their lives seems progressive. However, people would call a guy “reclaiming masculinity” sexist and anti-feminist, as it is exclusionary toward women who want to engage in traditionally masculine behaviors and spaces. Why are gendered labels okay when it’s in favor of women, especially when they continue to exclude others?
We see women’s empowerment as punching up since they have historically had less power, but this doesn’t acknowledge the groups that these (often cis and white) women oppress. Queer people are hit hardest by this pointless gendering, a group without power over cis women. To make real progress, we need to move past exclusion rather than just giving power to the most privileged women.
Capitalism and Racism
As bad as the exclusion of queer people is, it is one of the more visible issues; what is sometimes harder to see is how some of the labels and identities of these women are functioning to further capitalism and racism at the expense of women of color around the world. One of the best examples is “bimbo” feminism.
Bimbos are women who conform to traditional femininity, seeking to reclaim the previously derogatory term through sexual liberation, rejection of work, and an embrace of everything “feminine”. However, as previously noted, digging heels into gender is not the way forward. There are many arguments made for and against bimbos and bimbo feminism, but most of those arguments ignore the perpetuation of white capitalist power at the expense and further oppression of others.
One of the most visibly noticeable ways this occurs is through the support of cosmetic surgeries and procedures. Take lip filler for example. Bimbos often seek out larger lips to achieve the stereotypical bimbo look. However, the sheer number of white women getting lip filler is concerning. For as long as white people have been racist, they have mocked people of color for facial features such as large lips. Eurocentric definitions of beauty have excluded these features in favor of their own. But now that white people have deemed larger lips attractive, they are going out of their way to cause potentially permanent harm to themselves to appropriate these features they were racist about for so long. However, once these features are deemed attractive, the privileges and power of beauty are not extended to people of color who naturally have these features, only to these features on an acceptably white body.
Further still, one of the most seemingly harmless aspects of bimbos, the bleach-blonde hair, is evidence of deeply-rooted racism. Since naturally blonde hair is a genetic mutation that came from Northern Europe, these people are almost always white. And since the mutation is not a dominant trait, this means that blonde hair is a good indicator of whiteness. So, when people quip that people prefer blondes—that blondes are more attractive—this is because of the racism embedded in Eurocentric beauty standards that exclude people of color. Seeking out blondes for relationships and reproduction encourages the proliferation of white people, which is further exacerbated by forced sterilization and inhibited reproduction of people of color and disabled people.
This isn’t the only way bimbo feminists gain power through the exploitation of other women. Bimbo feminism is by definition an identity rooted in capitalist consumerism. The bimbo look requires buying products and undergoing bodily changes that further line the wallets of the already powerful at the expense of underprivileged women. This involves complexly produced fast fashion clothing that can only be made overseas, where women of color are exploited and underpaid. And when those clothes are shipped across the world, it furthers existing climate issues. Additionally, the rejection of work that many bimbos engage in pushes the burdens onto already exploited women in the cleaning, food service, and childcare industries. The privileges of these white feminists come at the expense of these hardworking and underappreciated women of color.
But even without the consumerist elements of bimbo feminism, another important aspect, sexual freedom, seeks only to empower cis-white women. Women of color who embrace sexuality and sexual freedom are still shamed and stereotyped, and trans women are deemed predatory for their sexuality, especially if they are not passing. Every aspect of an identity lauded for reclaiming the limited definitions of femininity harms someone with less privilege than cis-white feminists.
Gender Neutrality
The continuation of gendered labeling empowers the few who can conform, leaving intact the power structures that enable their privilege. We need to move past these surface-level performances of progress and instead form senses of identity that don’t rely on outward appearances that conform to existing social structures. This can be difficult for neurotypical people who rely on heuristics and mental shortcuts to go through life and form identities, but through attention and hard work, they can look past the labels and form identities through human experience.
Someone doesn’t need to be a Pilates princess, muscle mommy, or gym girlie. They can just be a person who goes to the gym. Someone doesn’t need to girl-ify their quick dinners and frivolous purchases, they can just be a human who sometimes doesn’t feel like making a meal or who wants to treat themselves to something that will bring them joy. Someone doesn’t need to make the color pink a girly thing, they can just be a person who likes pink. People can exist as people without conforming to a certain definition.
Conclusion
Critiquing women is often taken as anti-feminist, and this is actively holding the feminist movement back. By virtue of being human in a shared society, people’s actions have consequences that can harm others and one cannot claim feminist freedom of choice to be spared from valid critique of the harms of their behavior. A movement that claims to be for women is not only excluding but actively harming countless women. To move forward, we need to work on bettering the lives of the least privileged women in the world, because when the least privileged people's lives are improved, that means everyone’s lives are improved. By getting rid of the boxes rather than redefining what they mean, we can allow space for everyone to exist without perpetuating the existing power structures that keep people down.
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